Is A Long Distance Relationship For You?

Long distance relationships are not for everyone. One thing you can expect from a long distance relationship is that you will be spending far more time on your own, than you would in a traditional relationship. Either way, it is important to understand the difference between feeling alone and loneliness.

In a long distance relationship you may spend extended periods of time alone, however this need not be a reason for feeling lonely. In this virtual era it is so simple to stay connected, that loneliness need not be factored into a long distance relationship. Imagine living in medieval times when the only way to communicate with a spouse at a distance was to send a letter with your servant, if you had one, or a paid carrier on horseback.

The quality of time spent alone or together, in a relationship, depends on us, whether the relationship is long distance or not. Let us have a look at the pros and cons.

PROS

I. Always Having Something To Look Forward To

Repetitive day to day life, can harm a relationship more than distance will. You may lose sight of that spark which lit up the night sky and set you both on a magic ride, fitting of a fiery chapter in a racy romance novel. By contrast, a long distance relationship will feel like you’re going on a honeymoon over and over. It’s like Christmas morning every time you meet again. The key is to focus on improving the quality of our time together rather than the quantity. Time spent together, in a long distance relationship, is rarely taken for granted.

II. Distance Makes The Heart Grow Fonder

It is said that distance makes the heart grow fonder. There may be some truth in this. For some people, it works, for others it doesn’t. It all depends on the individual. If you are a romantic at heart, a long distance relationship can fuel your deepest fantasies of bliss and longing. If you are a creative spirit, a long distance relationship can be the perfect muse to inspire your artistic creations, while leaving you plenty of alone time to work on these.

III. A Bridge To A New Life

If you have an adventurous spirit, then a long distance relationship might be perfect for you. You can turn it into an opportunity to engage in a new lifestyle, which will involve plenty of travel and maybe learn a new language. You can also opt for a new life altogether by eventually relocating. A long distance relationship can be an opportunity and the perfect bridge to help you cross over to a new life.

CONS

I. Costs

Travel costs incurred in a long distance relationship can become an issue if the distances travelled are major and involve air travel. If your partner lives in a different country, you’ll need to consider the difference in cost of living, if any, between the two countries. Your paycheck may not go as far if you are spending half the year in a country with a higher cost of living than your own.

II. Trust Issues

Distance can play havoc on our imaginations and unleash a series of unpleasant emotions, ranging from jealousy to feelings of insecurity. A traditional relationship does not guard us from these issues. Whether you are apart one hour, one day or one month, will not make the difference, if there are trust issues at play. The amount of time spent together will not in itself resolve these issues. Trust needs to be built and earned in any type of relationship.

III. Starting A Family

If your heart is set on having a family, then a long distance relationship is not exactly the right formula. We don’t always get to choose who or when we fall in love. If it so happens that you meet that special someone in a place far from home, be sure to talk about what is important to you and if it’s having a family, then one of you may need to relocate.

A long distance relationship can provide a rewarding and successful life. Remember to set some ground rules that both of you agree to respect. When you are apart, keep busy doing the things you love, work on yourself and enjoy quality time with friends and family.

Published by Maddalena Di Gregorio

“I kept always two books in my pocket, one to read, one to write in” Robert L. Stevenson

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: